Here we go again... (see round 1 here)
- Drugs. Drugs. C-Section. Drugs. Drugs. More Drugs.
- Twilight Birth: I’m still pushing for this. Really... As I recall, my main contribution to my last c-section was puking on my husband... y’all got this! I work in marketing - it’s not like you need me to coach you on what to do behind that curtain.
- Speaking of said curtain - if twilight isn’t happening - can we get that thing raised to the ceiling? And dear lord yes do NOT walk me through what’s happening... I already know you’re Marie Kondo-ing my insides - no need to tell me how you’re tidying it up.
- Again, if my husband wanted to watch the miracle of birth he should have taken the birthing class (preferably with someone else). Keep him waist-high... if I’m puking on a person it’s going to be someone who can’t charge my insurance for it.
- Let’s go ahead and clean up that kiddo before hand-off. I’ll have years to ruin her life... let’s not start on day one by puking on her.
- For post-birth planning: I will gladly continue to accept the drugs that the people in the labor and delivery section are rejecting...
Importantly, know that I trust you and sincerely apologize in advance if my projectile vomiting gets on your shoes... but please don’t take my drugs away if that happens.
